Monday, June 11, 2007

Day 6: I don't have a goddamn clue who my rival is supposed to be.

Now that I have a SURF capable Pokémon, I never have to go through that Cave of Annoyingly Disgusting Odors and Balloon Bunnies again.

Thank god.

I make it to MAUVILLE, where some guy that I'm apparently supposed to recognize tasks me with shutting down a generator for some reason. He doesn't really give me any backstory on why it needs shutting down, but, hey, it's XP.

So I SURF on down to the place where he told me it was, kill some Voltorbs and Magnemites, turn off the generator, blah blah blah. He doesn't even give me anything cool.


I SURF East from MAUVILLE, and see a whole lot of not-very-threatening trainers. Rich devours their eternal souls, and we're well on our way to the next town, when all of a sudden, who do I spy but the Team Aqua assholes again.

And this time, they've taken over a Weather Institute to get some Pokémon they were genetically engineering there.

Yes, a Weather Institute had the capability to genetically engineer creatures.

And I don't have a damn clue why.

Since half of Team Aqua's grunts has Water Pokémon, Rich again tears through them with Leaf Blade.

I clear Team Aqua out, and the weather nerds reward me with CASTFORM, the very Pokémon they were engineering.

Not giving a crap about the worthless thing, I don't even bother to name it.

I go a little farther and am challenged by MAY. Rich is so high a level that he wallops her WAILMER (Note to self: New masturbation euphemism: "Walloping the Wailmer") beats her SHROOMISH in one hit, and even takes out her COMBUSKEN.

Her Fire/Bird type. Defeated by my Grass type.

That's. Fucked. Up.
Sad as that may be, she then gives me the HM for FLY, and I do a little dance.

Yes! Now I'll just FLY from now on. No more walking for me!


What do you mean, I need a new badge to do that? Oh, goddammit.

Fine, I'll go beat the next Gym leader, then. She can't be that hard to get to.

What is this crap? There's an invisible barrier of some kind blocking the way to the Gym. Some random townsfolk mentioned STEVEN, who I ran into on my way here. They mention how he's stronger than even the Gym leader here.

Wait a second. Hold the goddamn phone. Is STEVEN my rival now? Or is it MAY?

And where the fuck does WALLY fit into all this?

I'm gonna hunt STEVEN down and get some answers.

I find him Southeast of town, complaining about there being something invisible here, too. He gives me a DEVON SCOPE, and the blockage is revealed as a KECLEON.

Rich lays waste to the little bastard, and we head on back to FORTREE to do the same to the one outside the Gym.

Once that's accomplished, we head inside, and are shocked to find that the floor puzzle in this Gym is nothing more than revolving doors.

I deftly avoid the myriad Bird Pokémon Trainers, and head straight for the Leader, Winona.

Whoa! Another sexy, teenage Gym leader! Sure, she uses a Pokémon type that Rich is weak against, but if I beat her, that'll only serve to impress her further.

Rich Leaf Blades her Birds into oblivion, and I collect my badge and fly on back home to visit my MOM.

As I would have expected, she has nothing useful to say, so I fly back to FORTREE to head on my way to he next badge.

What is this shit? It's raining? I suppose this means that everyone up ahead will have Water Pokémon boosted up by this, then.

Good. Rich's Leaf Blade trigger finger is gettin' a mite itchy.

It'll have to wait, though, because it's time for me to open up a savings account, having a new job and all.

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